Friday, 25 October 2013



so what is crazy anyway?

I googled. Here's a snippet of what I found...

informal; adjective
out of one’s head, off one’s nut, nutty, nutty as a fruitcake, off one’s rocker, not (quite) right in the head, round the bend, raving mad, stark raving mad, bats, batty, bonkers, cuckoo, loopy, loony, bananas, loco, dippy, screwy, screw loose, touched, gaga, doolally, up the pole, not all there, off the wall, out to lunch, not right upstairs, mad, insane, out of one’s mind, deranged, demented, not in one’s right mind, crazed, lunatic, non compos mentis, unbalanced, unhinged, unstable, disturbed, distracted, buggy, nutsy, nutso, out of one’s tree, meshuga, squirrelly, wacko, gonzo, absurd, preposterous, ridiculous, ludicrous, farcical, laughable, idiotic, stupid, foolish, foolhardy, unwise, imprudent, ill-conceived, silly, inane, puerile, infantile, fatuous, imbecilic, hare-brained, half-baked, unreasonable, irrational, illogical, nonsensical, pointless, senseless, impracticable, unworkable, unrealistic, outrageous, wild, shocking, astonishing, unbelievable, incredible, unthinkable, implausible, peculiar, odd, strange, queer, weird, eccentric, bizarre, fantastic, incongruous, grotesque, barmy, daft, potty, cock-eyed...

Whew. I find this quite amusing.

Another label. Another measure on whose scale?

I was 28. I received a fantastic compliment. Wow she's really got it all together.
And on the outside I did. Point being, on the inside  (no long sad story required) - I was crazy.

Beam ahead 20+ years. Still walkin the earthwalk. I have evolved. I've figured a bunch of stuff out. Finding truth. Letting go. Enjoying. Embracing all that I am and loving all that I am not.
On the inside I'm getting it together. Feeling good. Feeling happy, peaceful, content. And on the outside, there are those who say - she's crazy.

Granted I am more demonstrative than the average human. An observance by my second husband ... whatever you do, you do well. Very very true. Thing is, that works for positive and negative traits. I think that was my first real understanding of duality. Ultimately another step down the path of greater understanding of perception, beliefs and balance.

LLW  loving lightworker  counsellor
CJ  Cuppa Joy me
PSM  Pragmatic Saintly Mother  mom

CJ  my mother says I'm too sensitive
LLW  You know, that's not necessarily a bad thing

I find this quite liberating So during the next conversation with my mother that the you're too sensitive comment arose, I was armed.
CJ  Well that's not necessarily a bad thing
PSM  Yes it is

Shut down. Just like that. Ahh, the British are a tough lot. My brother and I joke that our mother's stiff upper lip is pulled right up over her head. Truth be told, she's quite the role model to live up to.

Genetically I come from a long line of nut bars. But who's the judge? My normal isn't your normal so why should my crazy be the same as anybody else's crazy.

Delight and be grateful in what is. One of many favourite Jack Nicholson lines in As Good As It Gets

go sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here 



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