The Tenant

In August of 2020 my wee family that had been occupying the bottom floor of my house, moved out for larger quarters which they desperately needed. We had a great rhythm, minded our Ps & Qs and when covid hit and we locked down, we had a houseful and really enjoyed each other's company.

We had Sunday night dinners where we took turns dressing up as one of us

Admittedly I was somewhat devastated after they left but was able to, after a week or so, turn my sadness to gratitude for having my son initially, then his wife and soonafter sons, be daily fixtures in my life.

For financial reasons I needed to rent out the space - a cute 1 bdrm & den suite. Garage access which is probably more suited to a guy. You even get half the double garage!

I had a couple viewings and on the third I found myself quite anxious about the guy coming to see the place. I remember almost wanting to call it off. When he arrived Tom (name changed) seemed quite personable. He'd had a bad go of things once covid hit. Lost his job, marriage broke up so he decided to move back to the west coast where he had a son from a previous relationship. Once the way his truck broke down, tools got stolen. You get the picture. I commented, wow the universe is sure kicking your butt. He agreed! Went on to tell me how he's started reading some books on that subject. Self-help, karma and the like. At 43 his life was kind of a mess and he was desperate for a place.

Being an empath I associated my anxiety before his arrival to be me picking up on his energy. While we chatted I decided to go with what was being presented (ref The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer) and offered him the place. As he was tight for money I agreed to a lower damage deposit even though he had a small dog. Tom also needed furniture. I happened to have and provided him with a queen size bed, small couch, coffee table, 2 chairs/table and a couple area rugs. I'm a compassionate person and I feel called to be of service to those in need.

It didn't take long to realize what a grand mistake I'd made.

My first inkling was when I went into the garage and found he'd helped himself to some of my spare furniture to put his drywall tools on (one item was my grandmother's delicate end table). I quickly hid the table and put his tools on the ground quite clearly marking the territory. In the days following I created a wall down the middle of the garage as he clearly didn't understand boundaries.

Barely 15 minutes later I went to attend to my laundry - it's a shared space. Well Tom had taken my clothes out of the washer and ran the dryer thinking he was being helpful. I wanted to scream and yell "Don't touch my shit!". Seriously who does that?

Instead I firmly said: Please don't do that. Some of my clothes are to be hung dry. I'm very attentive and it won't stay there long if you're in need of the machines. 
His reply: My ex-wife didn't like that either.
My response: in my head only  Then why would you do that with my clothes?  Duffus!*
*a foolish person as exhibited by extraordinarily bad choices

Later I commented to my fella, I don't understand your species. If you saw I had removed my stuff and put yours on the floor, why would you then move something else? An alien species at times me thinks.

Tom also had a very loud booming voice and liked to talk on speaker phone. Inside and Out. Or watch a hockey game outside. Many an August evening I spent inside with the windows closed just to avoid the details, complete with f-bombs, booming through the neighbourhood. We all knew Tom's troubles.

He removed the door to the bedroom citing he didn't need it which was fine. However he chose to put it outside under a tarp shelter. When I noticed this I moved to the garage for safe winter storage. Otherwise I'd have no door that fit the space when he left (which was now something I had begun to think about).

I put the garden hose away in the latter part of October as Tom always forgot to turn the water off at the tap. We were getting some frosty nights and I didn't need a hose splitting because a forty-odd-year-old man from central Canada didn't seem to be aware of that possibility.

It was late November when I was stowing my collection of garden ornaments safely in the shelter of the garage that Tom mentioned a mouse problem. He said he'd bought a trap but it was too small for the mouse. He gestured the size of rodent he'd seen. That's a rat I said.

Turns out Tom was leaving garbage in the garage. The house backs onto a creek which ups the popularity of the area for rat families and as Tom tended to leave the garage door slightly open (turns out that was his smoking area) and they sniffed out his cache. He said he'd take care of it. 

This is when I began to realize that Tom was a talk-but-no-action person. I used to be married to one of those. Doesn't mesh with my configuration.

A week or so later when my daughter and I heard the scuttling in the walls I set up rat traps and caught a brown one within a couple days. Note: this is against my belief as a somewhat-practicing Buddhist. However I needed to set a boundary. I let Tom know the problem was taken care of.

Tom let me know he'd be away for a week before Christmas. The day after he left I noticed poop in the shared laundry area, furnace room - and without venturing too far - throughout the suite. Dude was living like this. Then, right in front of me, Ratatouille ran from the bathroom to the furnace room. I screamed, booked it upstairs, slamming the door behind me blocking any access.

My daughter ran block with a tennis racquet in hand as I vacuumed the entire place. We set traps and patiently waited. Next day I went to check on the traps. One was gone... no trap, no rat. Next day, no further droppings. Seems we got him, but where was he?  

When Tom returned I talked to him about a number of things (condition of place on the top of the list) and mentioned the rat may have crawled off stuck in the trap and he may want to check the pile of clothes adjacent to the furnace room...  Sure enough he felt inclined to text me a picture of the black fella. A confirmation it had been found would have sufficed.

We muddled through the next few months and I prayed to the rental gods that he would move out. I felt uncomfortable with him in my home and only did laundry when he was out working for the day which became a rarity in the winter. I bought more underwear and socks so I didn't have to brave the shared area.

The final straw came when Tom mentioned 'your' fridge is leaking. My first thought was the upstairs appliance was leaking and coming through the ceiling in the suite. He went on to say he'd put a towel down a week ago and now it was getting quite wet and he had to put down more towels. I still envisioned damage somewhere. I asked that he defrost the fridge as a first step in case there was ice build-up or the like. He said he would do that.

I was stressing the laminate flooring was damaged as I hadn't clarified if the leak was interior or exterior. The next morning I thought I'd take a quick peek to ease my mind. Tom was actually at work so the coast was clear. 

I went to the freezer first as that's where ice build-up would be. There wasn't ice build-up but there was a dead rabbit's head with-no-face in the freezer door. WHAT THE FUCK?!! I ran back upstairs, grabbed my phone and took a photo. Seriously, what's with this guy... 

My sons were freaked out I was living alone in the house with this dude down below. This guy had to go.

I left him a letter the next day giving him 4 months to vacate. I would be renovating the upstairs kitchen and bathroom in preparation to sell my house and would need use of the downstairs facilities. Once that was complete my daughter would be occupying the space.

Thankfully there was no push-back. I said I'd be happy to provide a reference... 

One evening not long after the rabbit-head find, Tom was having the usual speaker phone conversation as he paced about the floor below. I thought I might as well and surrender and have a listen. As the universe would have it just at that moment Tom bellowed Hey Fitzy really liked that rabbit head. Oh my lord he was feeding it to that scraggly little terrior dog of his. Personally I would not touch it. I did once and did a full hand scrub afterwards. I don't think that dog had been bathed in years, poor little fella.

At least I had my answer to the freakish surprise in his freezer. I was not in danger.

Tom left within 2 months. I was getting anxious awaiting his departure sensing the condition of the place. I can't say I was surprised... the place hadn't been vacuumed in months; beverages had been spilled with no clean up and he even had the gall to take a few of the furnished items.

But he was gone and I would no longer be subject to the sight of him in his tighty-whities taking his dog out for a poop...

The World of Cubing

I have a fabulous 12-year old grandson who lights up my world. I would do anything for this boy (provided it's not illegal or immoral). A couple times a month I get the privilege of picking him up from school where our ritual is to visit a nearby coffee shop; his usual is the strawberry banana smoothie and I enjoy my afternoon Americano. 

We play 'smart games' on the internet - GeoGuessr - a virtual atmosphere moving down streets, looking at buildings, vehicles, signs and storefronts guessing where you are in the world (and we're pretty good at it!). And map quizzes - naming the correct country for a specific area such as Europe, Eurasia and Africa. We're Canadian - it doesn't take long to name the provinces in our country but matching up all 50 states in the U.S. took a bit to master.

About a year and half ago the little fella took up solving Rubik's cubes and he's a natural. Of course he's easily cajoled me into buying numerous cubes (who knew there was such a variety) and his collection now stands to close to 100. Watching his fingers in warp speed spin the layers of the cubes is amazing not to mention the number of algorithms he's memorized, just blows my mind.

The lad has entered a number of competitions and the energy at those events is wonderful. Kids of all ages gather completely oblivious to age, race or ability differences. Let this be an example of how our world as a whole should interact.

Recently he and I ventured out to a one-day competition taking a ferry (we live on an island) to the big city where over 100 competitors would compete with their 2x2s, 3x3s, pyraminx and 4x4s challenging their minds and agility. The format is brilliant - you compete only against yourself with a judge present to oversee the process - and the almighty timer.

The boy has amazing times averaging solving the typical 3x3 cube in 10 seconds. Yes seconds! I'd be lucky to solve it in 10 days or weeks would be more likely.

It was the last event of the day... the 2x2. There are five attempts with the lowest and highest times thrown out and the average of the other three being the final score. The kid was doing his personal best and on the last attempt got a mind-blowing 1.8 seconds. I was elated! Only problem was he forgot to turn on the official timer and was disqualified. He moved quickly from the gaming table packing up his stuff and I could tell he was choking back the tears. I gathered up my things, turned around and he was gone. 

I found him in the parking lot sitting on the curb by the car. "You okay?" I asked. "Nona you don't understand, I was on the podium" he sobbed. I was broken-hearted for him. A simple yet costly mistake. We drove back to the hotel in silence. I just didn't know what to say that might console him. We stopped for snacks; he wanted to stay in the car. 

"You know sweetie, even Olympic athletes make mistakes".  He turned to me and said "Thanks but I wasn't thinking about anymore til you just brought it up". Dang... I went into the store and bought his favourite bag of chips and beverage hoping to redeem myself...

The Winds of Change

A year ago today the life that I knew started to unravel. A series of events set in motion by a storm, the literal winds of change.

I live on an island in the Pacific Northwest. Last fall we experienced significant rainfall - much higher than normal  - and the water level of the creek that bordered my property rose quickly and flooded my house for the first time in 58 years. In past the creek had overflowed less than a handful of times with watercovering the lawn but never entering the garage.

I was on the mainland visiting my daughter for the weekend. At 7am I woke to my phone ringing. It was my tenant, a lovely young gal who had only moved into my basement suite two weeks prior.

"There's 4 inches of water throughout the basement" she said. "I don't know what I should do".

I was at minimum 4 to 5 hours before I could get home. It was over an hour to the ferry terminal and then a 2 hour ferry ride to the island.

I told her I'd call my partner and have him come by and assess and provide direction.

I'd been dating John for 5 years and admittedly it wasn't going well. It felt like we were stuck in a rut and there were some things we couldn't move past. He was emotionally unavailable in some aspects of our relationship and it was wearing on me. It was make or break time.

I called John and told him about the flooding. I knew he would be on his way to work shortly and asked if he could go by my place and check on the house and the tenant. 

"What am I supposed to do?" he said. I was a bit dumb-founded. If the tables were turned I would've been at his place in a heartbeat taking whatever actions were necessary.

"She's a 23-year old girl" I said "please go have a look".  In my head I'm thinking please show up in my life. Please be my partner. He did go thankfully, took the photo above but left without going inside... A snapshot of our relationship.

To add to the mix, three days earlier on November 12, I had received the news that my brother, my only sibling, had stage 4 cancer (lungs, bone, brain) and the prognosis wasn't good...

The Universe was serving up some heavy stuff.

On the day of the flood, it took several hours for me to get home. Raging winds that accompanied the torrential rainfall cancelled ferry sailings leaving me stuck at the terminal with major anticipation of what lie ahead. 

The water level reached 8" at the height of the flooding leaving a dirty line on the walls. It had receded to about 2" by the time I walked through the door. What a mess. Floor boards had lifted and were floating randomly. Interestingly I didn't cry. I surveyed the damage while a plan formulated in my head. John came over after work. "This is major flooding, definitely an insurance claim".

I was planning on selling my house the following spring as I was retiring. I certainly didn't need this major obstacle along with the other stuff on my plate.

Stoically I got the ball rolling and within four months I had cleaned house literally. Hours of hard work, purging physically and emotionally. It was May - my house was for sale with a fully renovated lower floor, my brother had stabilized, I was about to retire and John was gone.

In the summer I moved to a new community, buying a spectacular house with my oldest son. He & the fam (wife, 3 kids) live upstairs and I've got myself a groovy little ground level suite with endless access to my joyful grandchildren. 

As I reflect on the past year I'm amazed and pleased with myself for having the courage to ride the winds of change and create a new life for myself. I sleep well, stopped biting my nails and feel peaceful inside ... well most of the time...

Everyone deserves Happiness

When exciting things happen to people like a financial windfall, a new job, or winning a prize, I often hear "you deserve it" and usually it's "good people" they're talking about. Or when something terrible happens we hear "they're such good people, how did this happen to them?"

I'm not buying it. The statement begs the question "who is deserving" assuming bad people deserve all bad things and good people should only be subject to good things. It's based in judgement.

Everyone deserves Happiness. No questions asked.

Did you ever wonder how "bad people" got bad?  Most were likely subject to abuse or other mistreatment quite possibly from childhood. Or maybe life has kicked the crap out of them and they're tired & feel like giving up, or maybe they're angry and feisty. We rarely know what someone else's story is. 

There's so much going on behind closed doors - that seemingly perfect family may not be so perfect. And that family that appears dysfunctional may have more love & laughter going on between those 4 walls that some of us may never experience.

I'm grateful that as I've aged my heart has expanded with grand compassion and understanding of many walks of life. When I feel judgement rising in my psyche it's time to cool the jets and open my heart. I've experienced both "good" and "bad" things and it's just a perception of how that situation is affecting me at the time. I can't tell you how many "bad" things have led to incredible joy and love and became "good" things.

Take a deep breathe, love thyself and wish buckets of goodness on everyone as we all deserve to be happy.

May everything on or of this earth be free of pain
May everything on or of this earth be free of emotional and physical suffering
May everything on or of this earth take care of themselves with ease
May everything on or of this earth be at peace

Freedom is a broad word

These days there's much going on globally in the name of Freedom. 

For me, it's Freedom of Choice

This is my story. When the vaxines were mandated I no longer had Freedom of Choice. I had to be jabbed which I didn't find necessary given my circumstances or I would lose my job. 

At the time I was 3 months away from retirement, working from home and I live alone. Not to mention my attention to my overall health.

I'm a vegan. For me getting jabbed was like plopping a roast beef in front me and saying I have to eat it. It's not just about killing animals to feed me, I believe eating meat is not healthy for me. It's part of a regiment I've been following for years with the intent of taking personal responsbility for my health. 

I eat well, exercise daily (almost), meditate and practice kindness. I consider myself a child over the universe practicing the ways of the Buddha. 

Top of the list is Harm None. And that's in all facets of life not just whether I get jabbed for other peoples wellbeing.

Trust me, I'm no saint. I do eat potato chips and candy sometimes, I curse at inconsiderate drivers and battle with the Committee of Assholes living in my head. I didn't come to living this way without a roller coaster of missteps. I'm not 'pro-' or 'anti-' anything. But I do believe Freedom of Choice when it comes to our bodies is paramount. As is being of service to others shown by kindness, compassion and tolerance. 

At the very least we should show human decency towards one another regardless of differences.

Mudslinging, forceful and passive aggressive behaviours are dividing the masses on this issue of Freedom - a broad word and has many interpretations generally based in personal experiences. Before you paint the movement with one brush, take the time to listen - everyone has a story.

If you can't understand a different perspective there's always acceptance. Allow others to have options on how they choose to experience life. 

I have faith and trust that all will unfold as it should. These are the growing pains of a changing society towards more heart-centred experiences.

This is What I Know

Well another crazy year has gone by and shaken up the world as we knew it.

Our unsustainable systems are crumbling and people are finding their voices and questioning their known existence. Some are holding on desperately with fear as the driving force.

I thought it a grand idea to gift myself a Tarot card reading to end this year and welcome change. One of my fave readers, a tarot master and friend of the ravens (she's super cool) gave me the clarity I was seeking.

I loved her summary. 

2021 was a 5 year (2 + 2 + 1); the number V card in the tarot is the Hierophant, the male counterpart to the High Priestess ruled by Taurus. The energy of the Hierophant is asking us to examine our beliefs.

Are your beliefs rigid and dogmatic?

Have the lessons you've learned served you well?

Is it time to find a new teacher?

Do you make decisions based on what you "should" do or are you tuned into your higher calling?

Wow... This energy presented itself in my life in a big way. I felt like the past few months my world crumbled as these very questions presented experiences that made me face alot of my fears. And throughout 2021 I watched the world around me seemingly reach a crescendo of judgement and division.

Thankfully the new year - an energetically charged number - 2022 brings the energy of VI The Lovers

Are your head and heart united?

Tune into your heart's desires

Take ownership of your choices

If you are acting out of love you are on the right path

Humanity is moving out of a 2000-year Fear paradigm into the Age of Aquarius just as the hippies have been singing out for 50 years. The new paradigm is that of a higher consciousness: Love, Faith and Possibility.

Transition takes time and those in fear - and afraid of change - are trying desperately to hold to the old paradigm. Time to surrender and enjoy the ride. Have faith we are going to a better existence.

I know I am 

In 2022 I will complete 60 loops around the sun. I will retire, sell my house and move into a whole new existence. This life has been great - I got my butt kicked and learned lots and it's time to level up.

My intention for 2022: Find Joy Every Day

Interestingly today's Tarot Card of the Day is XXI (21) The World. Good bye 2021 

Thanks for the ride! 

Things I Don't Do (sometimes)

There's a lot of judgement going on these days. We've served up the perfect atmosphere for humans to do what they do best: observe and comment on those around us and what we should and shouldn't be doing.

In this time of Covid, I proclaim myself to be a Distancer with regard to the Mask Debate. I see 3 groups: the Maskers, the Distancers, and the Indifferents.

The Maskers take the stand that if we all mask up everyone will be fine and this will go away. I had to snooze a friend on facebook as her daily pro-mask memes and messages had me feeling like the Jehovah Witness were continually at my door.

The Distancers (like me) maybe don't take such a firm stand and prefer to physical distance from people. Breathing freely is a beautiful thing and unless I'm within close proximity to another person in a confined space I choose to enjoy my 6 feet of space.

The Indifferents either don't believe there's a virus, don't care if there's a virus, or who knows may even be summoning the virus.

I find the Maskers interesting. Is it a level of safety and protection, or comfort in the anonymity of wearing a mask? With regularity a Masker will invade my 6 feet perhaps mistaking me for an Indifferent. I practice non-judgement however at times I can't help but sense a level of arrogance as I'm acknowledged with disdain ("a good citizen would wear a mask").

I refrain from engaging in the Mask Debate as to why I'm a Distancer but to be honest there's a actually a whole list of Things I Don't Do (sometimes).

I don't wear a bike helmet
I don't wear my seat belt 
I don't answer my phone when it rings
I don't brush my teeth every night
I don't answer the doorbell
I don't eat all my vegetables
I don't change flat tires (though I could but why not get someone else to?)

I'm not an irresponsible person by any means. I've raised 4 kids, hold a professional level job and am a contributing member of society. But I am a sovereign being and have the confidence in myself to assess situations and make choices for the greatest good.

I practice a "live and let live" attitude and look forward to a world where more of us can celebrate our differences rather than fear them.

Politicians will cycle through and Laws can be changed but the responsibility lies with all of us to practice tolerance, kindness and respect for each other on a daily basis.

I encourage people to open your minds and learn about the Universe and life around you. What a fantastic place and time we are in. The possibilities are endless! 

And write your own list of Things You Don't Do (sometimes).

Hit the Pause Button

As I do my part and stay home during this global COVID pandemic I'm reading alot from a variety of sources and making my own conclusions as a sovereign being on this planet.

Regardless what my, or anyone else's view is - was is it a bat that started this virus? was it planned? Isolate the population or herd immunity? In the big picture, does it really matter? Here we are and what'll you do with this time. Could be a curse or a gift. I'm choosing to look at the wonderful things happening from the Universe hitting the Pause button on humanity.

Fantastic things are happening. I believe the animals are rejoicing. Or perhaps they don't even notice because they're not focused on us! And mother earth is getting a much-needed deep breath as our air clears and the hum of human bees is silenced. Sitting outside is magnificent. I hear the stillness only interrupted by a myriad of bird song - and the odd neighbour mowing their lawn.

I see kindness and compassion for those who's lives have been up-ended. People becoming aware and looking out for each other on a mass scale. The whole world is in this - they are no different than I. As a collective, our hearts are opening.

My heart goes out to those who have had their worlds rocked, not just by covid but by natural disasters, family illness, accidents and life itself that continues daily. Our challenges bring us opportunities to experience being a human on this planet. It's just not always pretty but inevitably shows the preciousness of life itself.

I've been fortunate as there's been little disruption in my life, and what has been disrupted is good. The isolation has meant I'm doing my job from the comfort of my sanctuary. I've been wanting a change but didn't see it coming this way. I'm grateful for the opportunity to test the waters. Not having to continuously rush, it's so much easier to settle into the Now as it really doesn't matter what day or what time it is.

I feel more peaceful inside amidst the external chaos.

And maybe that's the takeaway. Practice living now. Enjoy those around you, reach out to others. Be kind. Breathe in the air and relish existence.

Hello 2020

In anticipation of the new year I'm finding myself affected in a profound way. Maybe because of the numeric aspect, afterall my number is 22 - not necessarily lucky, more like significant. And in terms of numerology 2020 is 22. I'm trusting in the Universe for significant and beyond...

And the number sounds so futuristic for a gal born in the 1960s. Weren't we supposed to be flying around like the Jetson's by now? 

But it's on a grander scale. It's more an aging thing. And what a gift it truly is to age.

The first few years after 50 were uncomfortable. I resisted being what I perceived as old. Things - specifically my body shape - were changing. Ugh! Gravity is a bitch but thankfully menopause ends... 

Now on the downside to 60, I feel differently and I'm grateful for every year that number grows. Beyond my own experiences, I've watched many struggle and suffer with aches, pains, illnesses and death within families, friends. The paradox of that sorrow is through that grief I have been able to find joy and gratitude in simply being alive.

Everything is precious and time is a commodity that not even the rich can buy However they can purchase regenerative IV treatments. How do you think the Royal family is so long lived? I've found balance. My sense of humour has improved. Why take it all so seriously? Yet another paradox - the things that should be taken seriously are. Soul has replaced many aspects of ego and the need to be right. okay, still working on that...  I'm learning to be truly present, understand what love really is and take great delight in observing life happen. It's a magnificent unfolding story.

I told my grandson I wanted to be at his 50th birthday party. That would make me 99. Game on!

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood

It's Saturday. I'm home and loving it. Working the grind, the Monday to Friday slavitude, can be tiring so I'm grateful to be able to allow my day to unfold with the rhythm of my heart.

I have a few errands to run and I like to get out and take care of business so I can hunker down at home for the afternoon. Plus I'm outta weed...

Being a list person, I make a plan. Bank, groceries, dispensary. I live in a smallish city so I'm fortunate that the 3 stops will get me back home in just over an hour. I love the area where I've spent the lion's share of my 55 years on the planet. My first stop at the bank is to open an RRSP account so I can lessen the amount of tax I seem to owe the government every year in spite of the thousands I've already handed over. I'd rather do that and get the deduction and keep my money rather than having more tax taken off my diminishing pay cheque. The process is easy - the bank teller is knowledgeable and asks me all the right questions to ensure I'm opening the right kind of account. Within 15 minutes I'm done and onto the next stop. Woohoo.

Begin a vegan can be a bit challenging for groceries. There are 3 stores within my area that supply the foods I eat and I know where to go for the cheapest price for the various products. Today I'm stopping at Whole Foods, an absolutely beautiful shopping experience. The energy in this store generated from the fresh organic foods and generally happy people make it a high vibrational atmosphere.

My last stop is the dispensary. I'm not a drinker (I'd fill a few blogs to explain why... lol) but I do enjoy a puff. I'm grateful for the convenience and guidance a dispensary provides. I'm not advocating chronic smoking however it beats the hell outta meeting some teenager in an alley. If I can go to a liquor store to buy booze, why can't I purchase a mind-altering substance of a different kind in a regulated manner. That's a whole other argument which seems to be playing out and moving forward.

I'm a member at Trees - a premier dispensary in our area. As the legalities get worked out in Canada, Trees is positioning themselves to be a frontrunner in the distribution following all current laws, displaying proper permits, well-paid knowledgeable staff, and environmentally-conscious. They even have a recycling program for their packaging giving 10% off when you bring back the plastic sleeves.

There's no other customers when I arrive so I start chatting with the two fellas behind the counter both of whom I've seen several times before. They're upbeat and talking about how spectacular their walk to work was this morning and how it's Spring and the birds are back. I'm delighted that these 'young guys' are in tune with nature (though they're probably late 20s-30ish). The one guy starts talking about his experience living in Edmonton where the magpies responded to him playing his didgeridoo. He made friends with them and they mimicked each other's sounds back and forth. They noticed his routine and would wait for him to come home from work and play with them. After a few months he had up to sixty birds singing with him. He said he loved communicating with birds and knew several different calls, and proceeded to perform them. It was a magical exchange and it filled my heart. Beautiful people. I have faith that all will be well in this world with the millenials. I finished my transaction and was about to leave when the guy with the dreadlocks (it is a dispensary after all...) told me to hold on. He went over to a jar and grabbed a pre-rolled J, handed it to me and said thanks for chatting with us. My heart wells. He goes on to say what a great customer I am, always happy and smiling when I come in and they're genuinely glad to see me. I'm moved to tears by the kind words and the gesture. Ahhh you're gonna make me cry, I say. All three guys in the store then say goodbye calling me by my name.

I walk out to my vehicle feeling so blissful in my world. Grateful to be alive and surrounded by beautiful souls.

However it does occur to me when you're on a first name basis with the weed guys I might be too good of a customer!

Happy 420

I am a Grown-Up

A few weeks ago my son fixed up my bike for me. I've got a somewhat derelict of a two-wheeler complete with fenders and a rat-trap though the upper hinge portion is long gone (that's why they invented bungi cords!).  Originally I borrowed the bike from a co-worker who's ex-wife had left it behind. That was over 8 years ago and that machine just morphed into mine. The memory foam seat is well worn with my butt impression.

L'il Black, as I fondly call her, was dormant for a few years. She stayed at my mother's place 2 hours north of my home for 2 years as I didn't have a vehicle to bring her back. I finally did and again she sat...

My son (handsome and handy) pumped up the tires, oiled & adjusted the chain, tightened the spokes and checked the brake cables. I was off.

I had forgotten the utter sense of freedom and joy my soul felt gliding along the pathways. I was elated. I'd found a place where I paradoxically lost myself in how alive I was.

L'il Black and I have subsequently spent many hours together exploring the extensive trail system in the beautiful city where I reside. My goal, for years now, has been to cycle to work roughly 10 km into the city about 35 minutes along the scenic cycling route sans car traffic. A rejuvenating ride indeed.

Last weekend I thought I'd explore one of the other cycle routes and headed north with 3 water bottles strapped to the rack on the back fender. I had my bike helmet on the handle bars...  here's where the disconnect between me and other people begins... In our area it is a law (of sorts) to wear a helmet. I do not like to wear a helmet, or a hat of any kind really. Not just cause it wrecks my hair but it's not comfortable, I get hot, yada, yada, yada. Basically I hate stuff on my head.

So I'm blissfully riding along a trail. A pack of riders pass by me decked out in spandex gear and aerodynamic helmets complete with the fancy shoes that fit in the toe clips. All male and from what I can tell roughly my age group (50+). One of the jackaroos chuckles to his buddy as he passes by "good place for the helmet".  I realize it's meant for me and my ego bubbles up and I holler "thanks for your comments". I am incensed. The group veers off to a coffee house and I continue along the bike path playing the interaction over and over again in my mind wishing I'd thought of some wittier response or even the ego's favourite... fuck off! For the next 15 minutes I can't quell the voice and I ride harder in an effort to switch my focus and release the energy.

Why does his comment irritate me so deeply?  This is why:

I am a Grown-Up. 

To refine it further I am a sovereign being fully capable of assessing a situation and taking appropriate action to ensure my safety.

I'm fed up with the North American attitude of safety-ing ourselves to death in an effort to circumvent any possibility of something not nice happening.  Don't get me wrong, just as the saying goes there is a time and a place, similarly where there is a need measures will be taken.

I've successfully ridden a bike for over 50 years and will continue to enjoy the breeze in my hair as I connect with myself and my world on my faithful steed.

Hello said a small voice

I got home today, sat down at my beloved HP window to the world, and my gmail was open to a facebook notification from last April.

What the what?  How does my email open itself up?

Last spring I took an online writing course. It was wonderful. However I'm shy at my core (some people find that one hard to believe) and wasn't much at the participation aspect of the course.

I finally got brave and wrote a little ditty to post on the class wall and the instructor commented. And that's what email my computer met me with this afternoon.

I haven’t written in months and perhaps this was a nudge to blog?  I don’t know. But here it is.

Spirit you are so cool...

Hello said a small voice from the back.

Slowly they turned, expecting to see someone but what they saw was a golden light emanating from a spot on the ground. It grew and as the light grew so did the sound. But it wasn’t words… it was music, like a choir singing, or was it?
No one really knew. What they did know was how they felt.
Warm and joyful. Elated and content at the same time. Smiles formed on their faces as tears welled in their eyes. Held in this space for an immeasurable length of time, seemingly cradled in an energetic bubble of love.
As quickly as it started, the sound silenced and the light dimmed, and they could see her.
You came they said.
Yes said the small voice, I found you all.

I do belong. 

The Necessity of Sadness

I recently read a blog of my all-time favouritest writer ever Jenny Lawson aka The Bloggess. And she is.
http://thebloggess.com/2016/05/31/sometimes-the-darkness-can-be-beautiful-but-sometimes-its-a-real-bitch-depends-i-guess/
I love her bold, brave honesty; she writes succinctly - with humour - about depression, darkness and the shadows. So many of us deal with situations, stress and emotions that qualify our participation in those categories whether we are awake to it or not.

Hi Jenny,
You don't know me ... yet  hehehe (in a good way of course)

I love you. Thank you for being so courageous and sharing your experiences which ultimately helps the masses and that, my Spiritual Warrior Sister, whether you know you are or not, is raising consciousness on this fabulous planet we live on.

Bless you.

This is a drawing by Jenny as well.
She reeks of creativity!

My own spiritual journey - amplified over the past 4 years - has led me to understand more deeply the nature of reality and this earthwalk we humans are on. A big part in how one weathers the experience is acceptance and letting go of things (people, experiences, behaviours). Two simple statements but complex at the root and takes much practice to alter the programming we've worn for as long as we can remember.

Although we can't make the darkness go away - it's a necessary component of the equation - by learning and understanding What's Really Going On (aka consciousness) it somehow it makes it just a little easier to ride out the waves, relax and enjoy the ride!

So if you want to explore What's Really Going On, The Untethered Soul is an awesome book. Only 180 pages, short chapters, easy to comprehend. Super cool concepts about this human experience.

And Jenny. Read Jenny Lawson's blog The Bloggess  (link above).
She's not about consciousness per se, just Real and damn funny.

You'll love her too.

Save the Apples

I have a fabulously abundant apple tree in my backyard. And it's old too. You can tell by the bark (no offense to those humans over 50 like me cause pretty much you can tell a human is old by their bark).
Each summer I give a couple of boxes of apples to the food bank and that makes me feel really good. I have an incredible peach tree too that I share the bounty with the neighbour who works at a seniors home. He says they like fresh fruit with their breakfast. That makes me feel really good too and I could go on about how important it is for seniors to have fresh fruit however this blog is about saving the apples.

Under the apple tree is a rock patio. I don't want to call it a gravel patio as the rock I picked out is much prettier than gravel. More ovally stones in brown and white tones... and much easier on bare feet - gravel can really hurt! Anyway as the apples ripen, they regularly fall off the tree either from the squirrels running amuk amidst the branches or the occasional blustery day. The problem is when the apples hit the ground from 20 ft up they're bruised, split and non-edible. And they're perfectly good apples or at least were. I hate to see such bounty go to waste especially when there's people who would love to be chowing down on an apple. Serve the masses healthy food I say! Let's be honest, humanity would be a lot better off if we all stopped consuming hordes of crap.

I've tried a number of gimmicks including draping netting between a few chairs to catch the apples. My son took a pic and sent it to his siblings so they could all laugh at their crazy mother. And I did save a number of apples; made navigating around my backyard treacherous though.

So I come home from work today and find my son working on his car in the driveway. We chat for a bit and my gaze is drawn to a handful of bruised apples strewn about the rocks.

Me   I have a new plan, I announce.
The boy   Better than the chairs and the netting?
Me   I know you guys laughed at me.
The boy   At least it wasn't to your face.
Me   My new plan, I pause, is to lay some foam pads on the ground so when the apples drop they won't bruise.
I remind him about feeding the homeless.
The boy   Mom, he says in his most understanding voice, I don't think our backyard would look that great with a bunch of foam pads covering the patio.
Me   It wouldn't be for long I say. Just a month or so...
The boy   I have a better idea.
And my eldest child unveils a brilliant scheme.
The boy   Move the trampoline under the tree. It has a net around it too so they won't bounce off.
Mom, we can Save the Apples.

Love that boy.

Colouring should be Fun

I've joined a Psychic Development circle with the intention to deepen my connection to spirit. There's 11 of us in total not surprisingly as 11 is THE number. I'm quite sure y'all get the reference as the whole 11:11 thing is pretty mainstream by now.

We're given homework at the first class. It's a colouring page the medium-teacher has chosen for each of us. You'd think this would be straightforward and enjoyable. Sigh, not for me.

I have attempted this mandela colouring meditation in the past year as it's gained favour across the country. Even my cousin on the east coast displayed pictures on Facebook of their family dinner where everyone had a colouring page at their place setting. My spirit peeps have been delving in this type of meditation for a couple of years now.

For me, it's like filling out a Form. I despise Forms. Some questions just irritate me and others outright send me down a path of questioning the world at large. It's like my brain starts sparking and fizzling leading to a complete shut down dependant on the length and stupidity level of the Form.

I searched for felts and pencil crayons in my daughter's room looting from pockets of stationery stashed in the madness that is a teenager's and sat down task at hand.

It didn't take long for the resistance to arise.
What colour should I use here? 
I should make a pattern. It can't repeat too much.
This is a terrible outline. It isn't even a closed circle. I'm going to have to merge colours.
I can't put purple here. It's too close to the other purple circle. 
Damn, I didn't count this out well. This looks terrible. 
I can't erase felts.
I can't start over.
This sucks.

Anything but meditative. I put it aside.

The night before class my family is over. My grandson spies the page on the chair. Out of the corner of my eye I see him pick up a crayola and starting colouring. I'm grateful. I suggest he move to the table and we spread out all the felt pens. Soon my daughter joins him and they complete the homework for me.

I take it to class the next evening. The first gal to share has noticed the differences in each of our approaches and colour schemes. As a therapist she has insight of personality traits and extensive knowledge of the chakras as a healer. I find this fascinating as she makes a quick assessment of each of our methods particularly as mine is about one third 4-year old. Things like outlining, vibrancy of tones, all give hints to who we are and where we're currently at. One of my close peeps had mostly purple in hers which makes sense as her third eye is stretching wide open these days! Another woman whose struggling with her level of empathy and needs to set some spiritual boundaries had set her intention for a balanced life and coloured her drawing very rooted - earth chakra - on the bottom half - and a myriad of colours above; an expression of allowing yet setting limits.

About 90% of the class found it a relaxing experience, one lady even disappearing for over an hour in blissful state. When it was my turn to share, I told a completely different story, a detailed diatribe relating the exercise to my hatred and frustration for Forms and how ultimately I just wasn't doing it. I 'fessed up it was actually my offspring that finished it but they could tell that.

Ruth (not her real name) gave me a detailed analysis of my psyche which I found most intriguing. She said I'm so 'out the box' that I don't like rules or anything that is trying to keep me 'in the box'. I giggled. She said you're gregarious and this is just nonsense for you. You'd rather be out there and helping people. Awww... the laughter turned to love and my eyes began to leak. I barely know this woman at all and it feels like she saw my inner light. The one that grows everyday as I nurture my soul.

The teacher-medium had a bit of a different perspective, likening my feelings to a block or I can't settle my mind or something like that but I'm sticking with the gregarious Angel...

Spiritual Warrior

I did this Facebook online game that tells your personality based on your selection (multiple-choice) of what you initially see when glancing at a multi-item picture.

My results...

You have a uniquely creative personality!

My interest is piqued.

"The main things in life for you are your intuition, wisdom, joy, satisfaction and curiosity." yep
"Your life is painted in a multitude of beautiful colours, and you're always looking at it through the prism of creativity." definitely me
"You live your life in constant anticipation of experiencing something new and wonderful." I'm likin' this
"However, at the moment you feel a lot of aggression inside. It's possible that recently you've been experiencing a lot of negative emotions and have the desire to finally resolve something that's been bugging you for a long time. You need to calm down and relax."

What the what?  I shouldn't be surprised... the Universe IS a mind reader.

Indeed many of my spiritual navigation tools (cards, number sequences, synchronicities) along with my wakeful sleep have all exposed the anger bubble brewing in my belly. Something occurred earlier this month which ignited a dormant pocket of fuel. Enough. Time for the peaceful warrior to take her stand.

Spiritually I know better than to hang onto anger as it only poisons oneself.
And wouldn't you know in a recent Reiki session an enormous anaconda energy presented itself and lay along the right side of my body - the male aspect - with its head upon my chest. I literally could feel this snake spirit resting on me and the slight movement of its breath. At the time I thought it was the Reiki master and I was thinking, okay that's a little weird but whatever, I'm safe and comfortable... The snake then coiled up over my abdomen and released eggs through my body at a cellular level to cleanse the poison. (I do live a most interesting life)

Thankfully after 20 days (and another visit from the snake, a couple of ravens and an eagle) I'm moving into Acceptance. Less stressful on the physical body. To aid my warrior stance I've participated in numerous Releasing Rituals some with chanting and burning under the full moon (fully dressed but only cause it was March). I was glad to find out that Letting Go was a process and can be practiced like Yoga - several times a week.  You show it to the door, and somehow it keeps creeping back in.  I was thinking I missed something. I put the list under the Boot in the Closet just like the psychic said and dang if HE didn't pop back into my thoughts.

Forgiveness? Not there yet. The story hasn't quite played out. The finale has yet to take place. And once I've moved through and released every heart-rendering scenario (my egoic mind's attempt to keep me in the box) I will joyfully welcome Forgiveness. I've got way too much dancing to do...

Don't let anyone walk through your mind with their dirty feet

Mother's Advice

I recently watched another fabulous documentary Spiritual Revolution on Gaiam TV ... wellness & esoteric version of Netflix ... I love it, of course.

One segment in particular caught my attention. Going back to the roots of the spiritual movement in North America, Bhagavan Das, the 27-year-old Golden Guru, sat before thousands at a gathering in California in 1972. The crowd anxiously awaiting The Word...

GG: I don't know. No one has anything to teach until they're 50.

And he walked off the stage. Now there's an insightful young man!  Being over that marker (not by much though haha) I wholeheartedly agree. And I'm sure when I'm 70 I will reflect back on how little I knew at 50. That's just the way it is. Although some people certainly have more wisdom ingrained than others, there's no match for years of living on this planet.

With that in mind, herein is mother's advice. To my four offspring, many other lovely young souls adopted along the way, and any other interested parties.

When you're having a crap time, whether it be physically or emotionally, it is your inner self saying Helloooo you're not happy inside. Something needs to CHANGE.

Your life needs looking at. Maybe just poor food choices, activities we're doing or things we're saying. Or maybe you're in an unbalanced relationship, dead-end job and abusing substances... lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

It's this beautiful internal guidance system we're born with. However from the get-go society teaches us to do any number of things when we get signals ... ignore, mask, suppress ... to name a few.

My latest analogy supporting the view of we're Light Beings having a Human Experience involves the board game Clue which I played as a kid. You pick a character ... Colonel Mustard, Mrs. Peacock, Mr. Green, Professor Plum, Miss Scarlet my personal favourite ... should I be surprised?  The game unfolds as the characters move about the board in search of clues eventually exposing all. Sounds a little familiar doesn't it?  Yep, it's an incredibly complex game we're playing here on Earth, that is all too real with pretty high stakes. And we have the opportunity to play with excitement, delight and joy.

The sooner one develops the ability to view and understand Life and Living from a different perspective, the easier this existence can be. We flow from experience to experience allowing the natural order of life to take place with the Serenity Prayer in our pocket.

Universe, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Sometimes I wish I learned this concept earlier on in life. Then I giggle ... Silly human, figuring it out is the Journey.

Time Warp & Weird Animal Interactions

I read on the internet today - it's official - time is warping. 

I am not mocking this statement whatsoever as I truly believe time has been kinda odd lately. However I'm not really one to pass up the opportunity to mock ... afterall this-must-be-true-cause-I-read-it-on-the-internet.

But seriously time has been weird. It feels like it's flying by; my colleagues and I were lamenting last week how it's already halfway through 2015. On the other hand when I look back at certain events, say last February, it feels like eons ago. I try to remember this observation particularly at times when I'm feeling a great deal of discomfort over how my life is unfolding. In simpler terms, hang on this crap won't last long; before you know it, it'll be weeks down the road and you won't remember what you were piss-moaning about... How's that for kicking your own butt! Spiritually-speaking I could be using kinder verbage however I'm embracing my personality and really, one's spiritual journey isn't about being nice all the time. It's about being true to your higher-self and the practice of accepting one's true nature rather than picking on ourselves.  Sometimes I say the f* word too

Of late, along with many other humans, I've been experiencing some interesting interactions with animals. 

My most recent tattoo was a design I created some time ago (I really can't remember, what with all this warping going on) but the basis is the phi symbol - like pi but not quite - it is an equation specifically the golden ratio - the rate at which everything grows. It's the symbol of creation.

As I'm a flowy kinda gal I added a series of dust specks which morphed into birds - growing, right? I'd got the idea from a design of a dandelion blowing seeds. The tattoo artist redrew my sketch and asked if they were a specific bird. No, just birds I said.

A couple weeks later I was standing at my kitchen window gazing at my abundant green surroundings. A crow landed on the wire leading up to the house. Wow, that's close I thought. A moment later he flew directly at me and at the last moment swooped up to the roof. Okay, even closer. Time to look up animal symbolism. I love the internet.

Crow represents creation. Many cultures believe crows hold memories of ancient worlds, ancient ways of living, and beautiful secrets.

Of course the birds are crows. Thank you Universe; you never cease to amaze me.


A dear friend and fellow spiritual-seeker had a beautiful experience with a chicken, ever more to be known as The Spiritual Chicken.

It occurred only weeks after he'd given up eating meat. I recalled, when sharing his reasoning with me, he told of a nasty experience years earlier when eating chicken. A drumstick I believe. With a crippled, gnarled bone. I could see by his body language how repelled he was even now. Needless to say for many reasons he felt really good about his decision.

It was on a Saturday morning when venturing across the yard to his man-haven aka garage there it was. A chicken. Living in a industrial/suburban area there are no neighbours in the vicinity that house poultry...  Cool he thinks. The chicken accompanies him to the shop and there they happily spend the day. That night it wandered off. He hasn't seen it since and is quite convinced, as am I, that the Universe was expressing acknowledgment, support and gratitude for his decision. The Spiritual Chicken indeed.


I work in the city which means parking is almost non-existent, and what is available is either expensive or time limited. The free parking, which is my preference, is a 10 minute walk from my building. This time of year it's an absolute pleasure and I meander my way in the morning through the city's original residential area marked by colourful gardens and heritage styling. One Friday morning I noticed a deer ahead of me on the sidewalk. That's a bit unusual I thought. Across the street a woman poked her head around the back of an SUV.
He's stalking me she said.
That's funny I replied.
She hollered No it's not.
Indeed the deer had now crossed the road and was approaching her and her little dog. I do find this amusing however I can tell this lady is rattled.
I'll walk with you I said. I have an umbrella and if it gets close I'll protect us.
We walk half a block back in the direction I've come, gradually increasing speed as we notice the deer is getting closer! I think it likes your dog, I said. Another half block and as we glance back the deer is gone; it appears he's taken the road to the right that we just crossed.
Whew, she says. That was weird. She introduced herself, thanked me and ventured the last stretch to her building.
It was barely minutes til I crossed back over that road again on my way to work. The deer was nowhere in sight... OMG, I thought. I bet that sly creature has cruised the back yards and will head her off at the pass!

I couldn't wait to run into Margaret again out on her morning dog walk. It was a few days til our timing meshed.
I've been dying to know I asked. Did that deer reappear at the end of the block?
It did! she said. I knew it!
What made the day even weirder, she went on to tell me, later that afternoon while visiting friends the same thing happened. A deer appeared seemingly fixated and her and her dog.
You should look up deer spiritual symbolism, I suggest.

I told my spiritual chicken friend about the deer interaction. He had just learned from caregivers at his mother's extended care facility that they often see deer around their premises, and believe them to be assisting with soul transition. In simple terms, assisting the death experience.

Come to think of it, I haven't seen Margaret and her little dog lately. Hope they're okay.

Humanizing

It's been my observance that Humans like to humanize things ... random stuff, other mammals and animals, and the big one ... God.

I've been an avid follower of Cesar Milan, the Dog Whisperer for many years. He clearly and easily points out how it's the humans that have the problems. And it's true. We humans want everything else to relate to us in our language without many of us even for a moment considering the other party. One of my fave insights into dog psychology is when Cesar teaches us that, to a dog, an excited human  hello baby, hello, come to mama  represents instability and he (the dog) better take charge of this lunatic.

I used Cesar's method with a chihuahua I came into possession of a few years back (that's a whole other story). To me anything smaller than a lab isn't really a dog so there was no way I was going to let this small beast be babied. For the couple of years he was on my watch that was the best damn baby dog ever. He hiked mountains with me (my rationale was if a 48 yr old chubby woman could do it, a 3 yr old chi could). We went everywhere with him mostly off leash (although he wasn't suicidal I still ensured he was leashed at intersections). And I did NOT humanize him. I let him be a dog. Albeit a very small one.

He did a bunch of cool tricks too. His best was Look Pretty.
That was a real crowd pleaser!

I heard a good humanizing story on the radio one afternoon. Apparently there was a dead crow on the side of the road and it's mate was snuggling and trying to nudge it off the gravel to the grass. Someone had called in saying how heartfelt it was as the one bird didn't want to leave the other's side. Nope, another caller (with scientific credentials) explained. Was trying to fornicate. 
Dreamy humans.

So that brings me to the big one mentioned in the opening line. God. 

Through my spiritual journey I have come to the understanding that we are all energy - a frequency - a sound wave - as our core component taking form as a mighty complex and miraculous biological machine. Our senses interpret and generate emotions that produce some sort of judgment, even in the simplest form of good or bad. 

Think about this: A surge of energy from something we experience is void of judgment until it passes through our human form which interprets the information. 

We often hear statements like ...
  Why would God do this?
  God is angry
  Sometimes bad things happen to good people (as if bad people deserve it more!)

All have a level of judgment to them. And judgment is humanizing. Assuming that God is male or female is another example of humanizing...

God is source energy. We are all an extension of source energy expressing itself in human form. And humans happen to exist in a third dimensional physical world based on dualistic existence. So really we just can't help it ... we're Human. That's our experience. Guess I'll stop judging...

Synchronistic Sunday

This post definitely deals with spirit, manifestation and other things that make a starseed like me squeal with joy. Those without antenna to ethereal realms may not find this story quite as delightful.

This past Sunday was 02-22 ... in my numbers world this is a signal to the heavens (or maybe from the heavens) that anything is infinitely possible today.

The speed of the cycles of late is fascinating and at times overwhelming. But one shouldn't be surprised as its inherent knowledge that the Universe is expanding faster and faster. I use technology as a reference as it's sooo in the forefront. Apply that expansion formula to um, everything, and it's a wonder any of us even know who we are anymore!

If you're still asleep - unaware, unconscious - to your surroundings you probably just think time is going by really fast and may be oblivious to the subtle nuances occurring and available. Wanna change your life? Wanna change your perspective on um, anything? These speeding cycles are giving endless opportunities to grab hold and go a different direction.

To equate that formula into my life over the past couple of weeks, here's the lowdown ... or should I say the download, of what I was experiencing at times.

        - absolute feelings of despair
        - stuck in the same thought patterns I thought I'd cleared
        - unrest linking to childhood

What the hell? And it felt like hell too. My comfort level was no longer tolerable. Time to do something. So I did what any spiritual being would do and had a Card Reading. Go to the Source literally and find out from my guides what was going on and what to do about it. Enough.

I got my mind blown. 

Confirmation of my origins, abilities and some tall divine guy hanging around on my left.

I was taking photos of the Angel Card from the reading and had to take a couple shots changing up the angle as a shadow kept appearing when I clicked the shutter. I got home and looked at the photos from my camera. There was NO shadow... Validation of his existence? I'd say yes.

For a day or so afterwards I felt like I was wading through a thick emotional soup. It was the processing of so many realizations emanating through me.

A few days later my current fave YouTube teacher, Matt Kahn, uploaded a new video  A Message to All Lightworkers   Brilliant. All about how those of us in the First Wave of Ascension were no longer required to clear energy for the Collective Consciousness.

Well no wonder it had been hell, I was clearing crap on a global level! Oh the challenges of being a Lightworker... 

All we had to do was decide when we wanted to stop and we were free to move on. I love the simplicity of the Universe.

Synchronistically the next day while browsing my current fave FB teacher, Danielle LaPorte, she commented it's time to stop telling our 'story' and start to frame up our future. Which isn't a new concept - certainly one I'd long ago heard in counselling... Seriously, how long do you want to talk about your problems? Whatever you choose to give attention to grows, favourable or nah...

Time to stop pondering and healing wounds and get excited about what could be!  I spent the next few days ramping up my vortex with delicious dreams. What I have come to learn is to churn it up, Imagine It, Feel It, then sit back and let the Universe unfold. My spirit guides enlightened me with the knowledge that I like to control the outcome (okay I knew that) and I also believe I have to conjure all this up. Absolutely Not. Let go and allow stuff beyond your wildest dreams take place.

Which brings us to Sunday 02/22 

While having my morning cuppa and cruising Facebook, an Event catches my eye. My sister in law had shown interest in this. I messaged her. Wanna go? She's in. I register us. I start reading the details.

Holy mother of all things Source ... one of the facilitators is the very person whose name I'd thrown into the vortex barely a week ago requesting the opportunity to cross his path.

You can't request anyone to like you. It's that whole Free Will thing. Admittedly I've been slightly annoyed about it at times. The fact that other people have free will, that is... 

A few years back I'd manifested crossing the path of my first love. That took me a good 8 months to happen and when it did, it was in the grocery store after I'd been on a 2 hour hike, no make-up, hair pulled up in a straggly bun exposing my gray roots. Oh ya that Universe has a sense of humour. Guess I should've been more specific...

Ultimately what will be, will be, and I'm enjoying letting go and allowing the Universe to amuse me.

What is truly amazing is the speed of the request materializing. Cycles going faster and faster.

My son decides on an image for a tattoo. The next day he sees 2 guys with similar. Maybe not, he tells me - he doesn't want to be mainstream. Look at it the other way I said. The Universe just provided you with 2 visual samples to assist in your decision prior to getting inked. Cool, he says.

About an hour later I head out - a beautiful sunny February morning. As I'm driving I'm thanking the Universe and my dad's spirit (of course he's angling for me on the other side of the veil) for this amazing show of manifestation. Miracle really. I park oceanside enjoying my coffee and the magnificence of my city. I notice a seagull in the distance flying towards me. Closer and closer until it's barely 20 ft from my windshield. Holy crap, for a moment I think it's going to land on my hood! The bird veers and lands on the cluster lamp standard a dozen feet to my left.

It's my dad! My heart swells. This is his Victoria. This is what he so fervently loved. A cluster lamp standard graces the cover of his record Follow the Birds. Energy flows through me and like watching an old movie, I have flashes of so many wonderful family experiences. I grin from ear to ear and bubble and squeak inside. Over 20 minutes pass. I don't want to leave dad, you go first. Moments after the thought leaves my mind the gull flies off only to land 50 ft away in the water. My turn to go. I start the truck and wave goodbye.

See ya real soon Pops!

The Universe has overflowed my Cuppa Joy and it's barely 10 a.m.